Rachel Anne Lorenz ~ Greg Leonard Oliphant
  Judith Marries Greg
22 April 2006

click pictures to zoom

Greg, Renee, David

Master Gregory and I were invited to two weddings, a baby shower, and a new-job party on April 22. Whew! We decided to fly to Delaware (a state known for incorporations) for the wedding of the Laurel's lovely apprentice.

We drove through rain to our hotel, arriving a little past midnight. The pool area had just closed, but we snuck into the hot tub anyway. Later, we learned that we narrowly missed Judith and her friends in that same hot tub! Seems her mother was staying at our hotel.

Greg & Judith

Judith was lithe and lovely and glowing, a befittingly beautiful bride. The audience members agreed amongst themselves, "Greg's a much better match for her than <she dated> <AHEM> <cough>."

Judith has a dancing X-Power. Given a reasonably clueful partner she, and she alone, can dance with a large train! She accomplishes this feat by unobtrusively kicking the train out of the way with her foot. Modern dresses, such as her wedding dress, have pin-up trains because modern women can't dance with trains.

Judith is an excellent dancer, and she and Greg planned to dance the night away. But the DJ didn't play the bulk of the obscure CD's they handed him. He just couldn't believe they really wanted to dance to that weird stuff, so mostly he chose his own music. But yes, that's exactly what the bride and groom had wanted to dance to!

David, Renee

I knew nobody at the wedding, and was afraid I would feel out of place. But we were lucky enough to sit with Amy. Amy met Judith in Italy. I placed my purse and hat on a table with empty chairs, and Amy rushed up, gushing, "Oh good, people sat down at our table!" She was so friendly, she made the wedding especially enjoyable for me.

Here, Greg takes a picture of me next to a cute mathematics whiz. David Eger is absolutely gorgeous in a black suit. He has such gentle eyes. This picture really doesn't do him justice. He's nice, too.

Above left, Amy leans on Matt, her date -- but not her date.
Above right, Amy shows us how to DANCE!

Greg says Amy has "latin hips." She sure knows how to shimmy her booty! Amy is a Google fanatic; David works at Google! Much shrieking ensued. Amy lives in Newark DE, and I hope she is entertaining her friends with stories of meeting the "famous author" at Rachel's wedding.

I can barely dance, to Greg's chagrin, but he managed to maneuver me through waltzes and foxtrots, and he made me look good with an East Coast Swing! At one point, he was swing dancing with me and another young woman -- whose name might be Ruth. Late in the evening, Greg broke into a Galliard! It was joyful to see.

There was a LOT of dancing. At the end of the evening, the DJ told the bride, "You two dance better than any couple I've ever played for!" I encouraged Greg to dance with his apprentice. But he did not. Perhaps he would have, given Renaissance music.

Judith and Greg live in Europe. After the wedding guests departed, we stayed to watch them unwrap presents and categorize them as "breakable carry-on" or "cargo-safe." I asked, "Were there any terrible mishaps that will be funny memories later on?"

Yes! The wedding almost didn't take place, on two counts.

First, they needed a letter from the Bishop of Mainz to certify that they could be married in the Catholic Church. But when Greg called the Bishop, he made the mistake of answering a question honestly: "And where is the bride living?" "With me." <gasp> Greg was able to finesse this sin by claiming they slept in different rooms, and the necessary paper was obtained.

Second, when they applied for a marriage license in Delaware, Greg was armed with his ex-wife's death certificate. But the death certificate wasn't enough, because it showed her maiden name. Without proof of divorce, the clerk was inclined to deny their request for a marriage license. At this point, Judith became possessed of sufficient ire to shriek, "Your ex-wife can ruin our lives from beyond the grave!" Greg sent her off with an attendant to cool down, and managed to persuade the now-sympathetic clerk to issue a marriage license.

A lesser issue, but stressful, was the bridal veil.

Judith's dress was from Macy's, perhaps the only time she ever paid full retail for a garment. It came with a veil trimmed with black, to match the dress. After the fittings and alterations, her father picked up the dress and drove to Delaware for the wedding. When Judith unpacked -- no veil! They called the store, and the woman was *very* unhelpful, going so far as to say "Your father should have checked to make sure everything was there." Like an average man would know how to check the bride's wedding clothes! The black-trimmed lace veil existed, but it was too far away to get to the wedding on time. After much ado, Judith made do with a white veil, rushed from a closer Macy's.

Brunch

The Toast

The next morning... look who we encountered at brunch!

In Delaware, they have not heard of mocha. I had to order both hot chocolate and coffee, and mix my own. There were eggs on the buffet. I took one, and so did Greg. Fortunately, before we cracked them, Greg thought to spin one -- and he discovered they were raw, not hard-boiled, saving us from egg on our faces.

Greg got us to BWI with time to spare. (Note: there is a gas station just before/past the turnoff for rental car returns.) In Denver, we could not offboard for 1/2 hour, due to a lightning storm, and when we did, it was hailing 1/2" chunks! After we re-boarded, our departure was delayed nearly an hour, again due to lightning! <groan>

During our layover, Greg had a $6 shoe-shine. The woman shoe-shine called it a pedicure for men. Greg said that the professional finishes with a blowtorch, somewhat like glazing a Creme Brulee, to get that glassy shine. He once had his stitching singed! But sadly blowtorches are no longer allowed on the far side of security <sigh> the passing of the good days.